You can be in an Abusive marriage or Relationship for Years and not Realise You’re Being Abused- Benjamin Zulu
You can be in an abusive marriage or relationship for years and not realise you’re being abused because you’re made to believe it’s your fault. You provoke them and bring out that bad side of them. You’re such a bad person at relationships. Something is wrong with you. If only you can ‘work on yourself.’
And so many victims will be full of doubts and guild when they finally reach out and open up to anyone. They will actually be asking you how they can behave better to improve their relationship, and whether they’re the narcissist. They’re confused and lost.
So what’s the universal precaution? Your friends and colleagues will notice when you’re becoming more and more unhappy and they will tell you.
The solution, therefore, is to never allow yourself to be disconnected from the outside world. Never let it be that your life revolves only around that one person, because that’s how they close you in to torment you. Always maintain an active social life. Abusers need to isolate you so you don’t get awakened by other people.
Attend church and don’t run away to a waiting car immediately after the benediction. Hang around and catch up with friends. Be active on your former college WhatsApp groups.
Receive those calls from friends you haven’t talked for a while. These people serve as mirror to both reflect on your life and detect when something is wrong. If someone has a problem with you staying in touch with people, you’re being led to a slaughterhouse. Run.
Also you must not be among those who assist their abusers by voluntarily cutting everyone off just because you got into a relationship.