Many of the people who try to date you are advertising something they’re not equipped for- Benjamin Zulu
Many of the people who try to date you or get into a relationship with you are advertising something they’re not equipped for.
They’re riding on the adventure and excitement of being in love with a wonderful person like you and yet they’re not trying to learn about the responsibilities it will take. They’re not prepared for the discipline and the consistency it will take for the love to work. They’re not keen on learning your need for growth and improving each other. They have not sufficiently sounded out your vision and where you’re going with your life. Many of them are just fantasising about where you’ll take them in the bedroom and in terms of money or lifestyle.
This mismatch of intentions is what causes the worst kind of breakups. To spare yourself you need to employ two strategies: do not get into exclusive relationships anyhow, and do not date someone who is not looking to settle. Instead of starting exclusive relationships with those you fall in love with, just start friendships instead.
Talk and interact more but without exclusivity. This way you get to see their true mettle before you commit and so you make an informed decision as to whether they fit what you need. Never get into a relationship ‘to learn each other better,’ or ‘to grow together until we’re ready for marriage.’
Second, only trade with prepared buyers. The others are window shoppers who are only thrilled to see a wonderful product like your character but they’re not ready to invest now and if you get entangled with them they’ll delay you forever. Sellers of properties like land always ask one question: ‘When would you like to make the purchase?’ This way they can decide if it’s worthy to invest in taking you around and show you what they have, an exercise that may take hours and energy.
Learn from the merchants and always ask when the person is looking to settle. Preparedness is personal and if they’re not there yet you must not waste time waiting for them.
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