Benjamin Zulu: Beware of Narcissists in Relationships, Guard Your Heart
In a powerful message to those navigating the tricky waters of relationships, renowned marriage coach Benjamin Zulu has cautioned individuals against entertaining narcissists and users, who often seek out good-hearted people to exploit. According to Zulu, it is not about attracting these individuals but rather recognizing their tactics and refusing to let them into your life.
“Stop asking why you keep attracting users and narcissists,” Zulu advises. “Bad people move around themselves, looking for good-hearted people. You don’t need to attract them; what matters is that you don’t entertain them.”
Zulu warns that narcissists often come disguised, using narratives of neediness or even feigned deep emotional connection to manipulate their targets. “These people are not your assignment,” he insists. “You shouldn’t give them a seat in your life, even if they come with stories of how they were broken in the past and have finally found someone who understands them.”
He points out that narcissists may shower their victims with love and compliments, rushing the relationship by claiming they’ve found their perfect soulmate. “Genuine people never rush to say things like ‘You’re exactly what I want’ or ‘I just want to settle down.’ They allow the relationship to mature organically,” Zulu explains.
Zulu emphasizes the importance of trusting one’s intuition when something feels off. “Whenever you feel rushed or your gut feeling won’t let you rest, don’t wait for more evidence. It may be too late by then.”
According to the marriage coach, users are incredibly charming when they find someone they stand to gain something from. He likens their charm to a dangerous trap: “Their charms can blind you until you’re permanently entangled with them. By the time you realize it, you’re in too deep.”
Zulu advocates for listening to that inner warning system—your gut feeling—that often signals danger from afar. “Almost every good person will have a brush with a narcissist at some point. What matters is that you don’t allow them the space to consume you,” he says. “Once you sense a strange vibe, fasten your doors and chase the jackal out of your space.”
Zulu also cautions against justifying a relationship with narcissists based on superficial timelines or apparent waiting periods, such as delaying intimacy. “If you’re naive enough to lower your standards and justify things like ‘We at least waited six months,’ you risk siring a child with these narcissists. Then, you will never know peace again,” he warns. “Your life will turn into a real-life horror of psychological torment and financial turmoil.”
In conclusion, Zulu calls on individuals to maintain due diligence throughout their relationships. “Narcissists can’t pretend forever,” he says. “If you’re vigilant, they will eventually fall off before they entangle you in their web of deceit.”
With these words, Benjamin Zulu continues to guide many toward healthier, more fulfilling relationships, empowering individuals to protect their hearts and futures from toxic people.