How to Keep Your Love and Tension Alive

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‘I caught a conversation on my husbands phone and hell broke loose….he texted a woman wishing her a happy new year and she responded asking about a pending date.my husband replied to her saying it has been long overdue.so when i found the messages i replied to the lady on my husbands phone and told her off.coming back to ask my husband about it i almost got beaten up.please advice.’

1. Never appear insecure.
You will feel threatened and betrayed when you catch your partner cheating or planning to cheat, but you must compose yourself and deal with your partner only, never the third party. Arguing with outsiders makes you lose respect and seem desperate, in addition to losing your grounds to protest the betrayal. It gives abusive people the chance to turn the tables against you, like it happened in this case.

2. Allow your partner to see you through the eyes of other people.
Let them see that you’re desired and admired by other people. It doesn’t mean you entertain advances by outsiders but that you continue to shine and be your best in conduct and presentation. Remember you’re not owned by your partner and neither do they own you. You’re committed to each other, yes, but you’re not to be assumed. Other people see your worth too. This elicits a positive form of jealousy and a sense of pride for having someone who others long to have. Erotic desire is competitive in nature. When we know that someone is desired by others we suddenly want them more.

3. Do not expect your partner to replace your entire community.
Keep your society of friends and colleagues even into marriage because what they bring to your life you’ll need it for all your life. Sometimes people are disappointed in their marriages because they overburdened it.

4. Allow moments of silence and distance between you, in a rhythm to transpose betwen moments of closeness.
If you stay together physically boredom can set in because of lack of variety of experiences. Create hours of separate experiences to enrich your lives with other aspects of life.

(©️ Benjamin Zulu Global)

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