Slowly by slowly the narcissist will have trained the whole family- Benjamin Zulu

Slowly by slowly the narcissist will have trained the whole family, by example, how to treat you. Once you’ve been labelled as the bad one you become fair game for everyone to pick on.

Your siblings, your own children and even the workers. The collateral damage of complacency in the face of a bully is that you lose respect even in the eyes of everyone. Soo your own child will start shouting at you or ignoring you and it will be a different kind of pain

Covert narcissists are harder to identify and therefore to run away from because of their humble and even self deprecating demeanour. They’re perceived as the nicest people and that’s the mask they wear in the public. They’re extremely hostile but also perfect actors. They say everything is okay but then they go out and do things that hurt you.

The degree of cognitive dissonance or utter confusion they cause you is through the roof. They praise you before people but then you hear so bad rumours they’re spreading about you and you don’t know what to believe.

They will do sneaky things like getting you in debts, putting you at logger heads with important people, jeopardising your job, inciting your family against you, blackmailing you when you need them the most, abandoning you at times of sickness or threat of death. And yet you cannot prove these to people because the narcissist always has a perfect cover story. You’re also not sure if their actions are intentional or they have silent struggles.

Solution? You can lose your mind if you play along with these human snakes long enough. They make you question your sanity and your judgement. You will quickly develop stress related health complications like splitting migraines, ulcers, hyper acidity, blood pressure, diabetes, stroke – and all these when you’re too young and your family has no history of them.

Your only safeguard is to trust your intuition and to act on your truth without the need for outside validation. Someone may be nice and liked by people. They may be a community leader or even a church minister but you have this gut feeling that something about them is wrong. Trust that feeling and avoid getting involved with them. If you’re already together and you witness the silent hostility leave early and don’t wait for people to see the truth. They may or they may not but you deserve to be happy and free.

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