How do I know whether a person is the right one for me?

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What do I look for?’ If you’re so blank about what you’re searching for you’re not prepared for dating and you’ll make costly mistakes. You need to return home and go introspect. Don’t go with the flow just because you’ve met a person you seem to connect with. That’s how most complicated relationships start.

Two questions you always ask yourself about everyone you evaluate. One, are they a good person? And two, are they a good fit for me? The first question is about their values and their character. It touches on honesty, generosity, consistency, spirituality, on and on. You need to have decided what character traits are mandatory for you. You cannot decide such issues when there’s someone in view already. You’ll get confused.

The second question, whether they’re a good fit for you, is about their lifestyle and how compatible it is with yours. Their goals and level of drive. Again, these matters are established in privacy prior to attempting to date.

One day I stopped by a hardware to purchase and ship home some construction materials the contractor on site had asked for. But the seller recommended I add some roofing materials which, in his expert opinion, would go excellently with the walling materials I had acquired. But when the consignment arrived home the contractor said that the kind of roofing we were doing couldn’t go with those materials and I had to dispose them at throw away prices. Such are the consequences for unplanned acquisitions: they might not fit your overall plan. Do not commit such unplanned acquisitions with your dating.

By Benjamin Zulu

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