Common Lies You’ll Hear in Dating- Benjamin Zulu
If you’re dating consciously, expect backlash from cons and low vibrational people in the dating pool. But most importantly, watch out for the sayings that have been popularised by these people to make you feel guilty for standing on your principles.
Remember, it’s always easier for people to make you look crazy for having healthy standards than for them to admit that your choice is proof that they could have done better if they wanted. Your lifestyle bursts their bubble that ‘it’s like this everywhere.’
1. A real man will accept me and my child.
Accepting your child is a personal choice, not a test of character. A man can be solid and true and still not want anything to do with a child who is not his. This doesn’t make him bad. He’s just choosing a life. Neither does it mean he dislikes children in general. It’s a different story when you have to adopt a child like your own. Someone should do it while prepared to never show indifference to the child or discriminate them against the other children.
2. You will be single forever for having too high standards.
‘Too high’ according to who? Usually, you hear this comment from a person who was frustrated at their inability to get you. They suddenly pretend to be the general overseer of the ‘market standards’, and they issue a warning from an expert position that they have never had. This is their personal opinion, not a consensus by the market.
Remember, it’s easier for people to accuse you of being too high than for them to admit they’re too low. Your stance condemns them because it reminds them of the level of discipline and self-control they have never cultivated.
You may be single for longer than many people, although it’s hardly ever the reason anyway – but you stand higher chances of staying married and happier for longer than those who accepted just anything.
3. Let’s break up and go explore; if destiny wants, we will be back together.
This is just another way of saying,’I feigned love to get your treasures, and now I’m done with you. I need to move on to the next victim, so please cooperate.’
Sometimes, this will also sound like ‘You’re too good for me. You deserve better.’ As if they didn’t know you deserved better when they chose you at first?
4. Sorry I can’t marry you because my family has objected to our union
‘I needed a convenient excuse to drop you, and I have to use my family. Sorry.’
This could also mean ‘Sorry, I pretended to be an independent grown-up capable of starting a family, but in truth, I’m just an overgrown teenager still ordered around by my family. I’m still too lazy to take responsibility for my life, and so I still depend on them for emotional or financial support. Therefore I must dance to their tune.’
5. ‘I’m no longer sure what I want. I’m having a personal crisis. I need to take a break.’
But I am sure you’re not it. I will know what I want when I see it. Sorry if I had lied in order to use you. I didn’t love you enough to be honest with you, but I still selfishly wanted to scoop some of your treasures, and that’s why I deceived you. I’m such an awful human being.
6. Coming from someone you’ve just started seeing: ‘I’m in a fix please send me this amount of money.’
I am either a criminal con using love as a bait, or a chronic financial mismanager, and I want you to bail me out. I’ve screwed up my credit with all virtual lenders, and I owe all my friends money. My family, too, is sick of my lies, and they can not lend me any. I’m hoping to use the cloak of love to extract money from you.
If this comes from a lady, it means ‘I don’t want you. But since you seem so into me, why can’t I cash out on your love for me?’ It could also mean ‘Hey, I want a lifestyle that I can not afford, and I hope you’re prepared to finance it, as a collateral for being with a disorganised lady like me. I hope giving you my body in return will keep the money coming. And in case you can not give enough, there is always a higher bidder.’
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