Stop looking at your partner’s phone or Else You Will Do This- Benjamin Zulu
Stop looking at your partner’s phone at every opportunity or else you’ll kill the sex between you. You don’t need to know every little detail of their life or else you’ll get into the region of familiarity and kill all chemistry between you.
Erotic energy, or sexual attraction, requires some separatedness and mystery. There must always be the feeling of ‘I am me’ and ‘you are you.’ In sex you’re trying to explore ever new dimensions of the other. So the moment you feel like there’s nothing left to learn about them, the tension is gone. And with it the curiosity and wonder that draws us to them.
‘But I need to know of they’re doing mischief behind my back,’ you say. Yes, but you can’t be checking every day. That’s your own fear and insecurities speaking. Your partner needs to feel respected, and one form of respect is allowing them their privacy. Privacy is the oxygen of the soul and without it we fee naked and suffocated.
Do not confuse privacy with secrets. Secrets are the bad things we do in hiding while privacy is the sacred space of our individuality. How to detect secrets with your partner? First of all, you must marry consciously, not just emotionally. Pick someone you have reasons to believe they’re an honest human being. Don’t just settle for powerful chemistry. Next, keep your eyes open, but from a distance. If you observe strange behaviours or your guts feel like there’s something fishy going on, then you can look. This kind of looking is justified and it doesn’t feel suspicious and arbitrary since it occurs so rarely.
(©️ Benjamin Zulu Global)
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